On the eve of turning 29 - December 2, 2009 - I pondered an enigma. What is happiness? For many years, I complained about life for never having had a mother figure, nor a father figure to advise me. I lamented never having lived the love described in Shakespearean stories. I lamented even more for not having enough money to splurge on empty acquisitions, without any purpose. Then, when I could no longer bear it, tired of always looking at life as if I were being oppressed, I changed my perspective. I confess I saw wonderful things. The absence of my mother made me stronger, capable of enduring hard blows; if she were here, my life would certainly have been different. I certainly wouldn't be this person that few people know. My father? Ah, he really doesn't know who I am. However, he taught me to have dignity. When I left his company, he told me: "Paulinha, be very careful not to drag your name through the mud. If you do, you'll have to pull it out yourself. Neither I nor anyone else can change your story. You'll have to bear the consequences of your own mistakes." I keep this teaching as one of the commandments that govern my existence. So! Where did this so-called happiness go? Happiness, viewed from the angle I consider best, lies in the small things. I cannot spend my life waiting for tomorrow to be a better day. I am happy now! I feel immense happiness as I write, think, walk, exchange ideas with sad, happy, audacious, arrogant, conceited people. I always learn a lot. I interact with diverse types. For the most part, they are good-natured people. I love people! I cannot fail to mention the "angels" who come "carrying me," giving me the immense pleasure of "flying," lending me their wings. It is necessary to live intensely, to be happy now, pure and simple. For free, truly. Loving is good for the spirit.
